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THE EPIDEMIC OF LONELINESS

RABBI MEYER LANIADO

“A GREAT FIRE BURNS WITHIN ME, BUT NO ONE STOPS TO WARM THEMSELVES AT IT, AND PASSERSBY ONLY SEE A WISP OF SMOKE.” VINCENT VAN GOGH PENNED THESE POIGNANT WORDS IN A LETTER TO HIS BROTHER, THEO, IN JUNE 1880 EXPRESSING HIS PROFOUND LONLINESS.

While we may not admit our own loneliness, many of us know at least one person who can relate to this sentiment. Even before COVID-19 and its consequent social isolation, loneliness was reported as being experienced by three in five Americans. Social isolation and loneliness were pronounced a behavioral epidemic due to their widespread presence across Europe, America, and China.

Loneliness is not only harmful emotionally and psychologically—it also takes a serious toll on our physical health, significantly increasing mortality rates. Dr. Vivek Murthy, our 19th Surgeon General, has made it his mission to combat what he calls ‘the loneliness epidemic.’ He wrote in a Harvard Business Review article that the pathology he witnessed most often when caring for patients was loneliness, not heart disease or diabetes. The CDC reports that loneliness leads to a 29% increased risk of heart disease and a 32% increased risk of stroke, while other studies show that loneliness could decrease one’s health as much as obesity, physical inactivity, air pollution, and smoking 15 cigarettes per day.

Some countries have elevated the loneliness epidemic to the highest levels of priority, including The United Kingdom which established a Commission on Loneliness, and set in place a Minister of Loneliness to develop and implement a national strategy to combat loneliness. In 2018, they published a report on grappling with loneliness, laying out a plan to address the problem and help in implementing solutions. They note that “it is possible to be isolated without feeling lonely and conversely to feel lonely while surrounded by people.”

I have found this to be true in my experiences with congregants, as one shared before the pandemic: “I’m in a city full of people but I feel completely alone.” Pre-COVID, this person was working with colleagues and social with family and friends, yet he felt isolated. This may be counter to our view of loneliness, which we generally perceive as being alone, without human interaction. Yet, many people, at least before the era of Zoom and remote everything, sit across from and interact with us while feeling completely disconnected.

A recent CIGNA study found that loneliness is more prevalent among younger than older generations: “Nearly eight in 10 Gen Zers (79%) and seven in 10 millennials (71%) are lonely, versus half of boomers (50%).” Before COVID-19, these young adults attended high school and college classes regularly, surrounded by others their age, yet felt disconnected. This is because loneliness is not aloneness or solitude, both of which can be healthy. Loneliness has less to do with the number of people around you and more to do with whether you feel seen and known by those people.

As my wife, Talia, so eloquently portrayed loneliness in an unpublished poem: “It is standing alone at a party, shifting from foot to foot awkwardly—knowing no one, afraid that no one wants to know you. It is being the only one in the room holding your opinion, your values, wondering whether you are the crazy one or everyone else is.”

It is the feeling of being physically seen yet invisible, of others not interested in getting to know you or understanding what you have to offer the world, what your unique passions and ideas are, and why. How lonely it is not to connect on this level with any of the possibly tens of people one speaks to each day.

One reason that individuals feel lonely is they realize that many of our social interactions are transactional. Too often, the routine greeting “How are you?” is a perfunctory question we ask, not seeking to receive a sincere response but to follow up with our next question, “Could you do the following for me?” We are looking to leverage the relationship rather than deepen it. We are not truly inquiring about the other’s wellbeing, rather attempting to maintain our reputation as a kind and thoughtful person, but in fact we are offering an empty platitude, not an outstretched hand.

We have become so accustomed to others solely reaching out or connecting when they desire something from us that we are caught off guard when someone genuinely asks how we are doing, waiting for us to move beyond the standard, “I’m good,” to what lies beneath the surface. While being transactional is necessary in many of our relationships, one way to counter loneliness and be present for others is to dedicate one or two interactions a day to truly listen and care, without an ulterior motive or planned outcome in mind.

Abraham, our forefather, serves as a paradigm of this, expanding out of his immediate circles to connect and show concern for others. The Torah relates in surprising detail how he cared for his ‘guests’ as a model for how we should reach out to others with genuine care.

Abraham offers his guests, “Take bread, satisfy yourselves, and then you may continue on your way. Understanding that they would initially refuse, he sent the message that he would like to give and is expecting nothing in return. He had no request for them to stick around, hear a pitch, or even stay in touch. He told them they could carry on with their journey, knowing he would likely never see them again and have no opportunity to ask for a favor in the future (he didn’t offer his business card or Instagram handle).

Furthermore, he was proactive, sensitive, and aware. He sat outside his tent, knowing that there were people who needed help and would not seek it out. He did not wait as Lot did for someone to happen past him. He actively searched for someone to help, ran to greet them when they did, and expressed that he was at their service. He did this not as a tedious obligation but as an opportunity for which he was grateful and excited. He rushed to have fresh bread made for them from fine, high-quality flour and ran towards the field to select his choicest cows for steak, ribs, and a roast. The most important part, however, was not the carefully prepared meal, but what was expressed: he was present with them and empathetic to their needs. His actions went beyond being merely polite or transactional. He could have felt he had done his duty and walked away to resume managing his multitude of flocks and other business ventures. Instead, he waited on his guests, staying with and tending to them, showing genuine caring.

This powerful lesson demonstrated by Abraham over four thousand years ago was recognized by Dr. Vivek Murthy as he wrote in his book Together, “What often matters is not the quantity or frequency of social contact but the quality of our connections and how we feel about them.”

The cure for loneliness is not simply interacting or even giving—it is being present and authentic, actively focusing on, and lending an ear to, another human being. It is letting the other person know they are not simply a task to cross off your list or a deposit in your emotional bank account to enable a future withdrawal for a favor. It is being there for another person even if there is no benefit to you, as Abraham was there for his guests, attentive, caring, and other-focused.

Rabbi Yisrael Meir Kagan, the Hafetz Haim, echoes this in his book Ahavat Hessed: Taking care of guests is not solely for those in material need; it includes the wealthy, and it is the caring and honoring of another human being regardless of economic or social status. This is also expressed by Rabbi Eliezer Melamed in his book Peninei Halakhah in the context of hakhnasat orhim (welcoming guests). There he relates that inviting guests is not only taking care of another’s physical needs; it is showing another person they are valued:

… to some extent the physical abundance has highlighted the anguish of the soul, and many today feel loneliness and alienation, and there is nothing like hospitality to alleviate their anguish. Good, sympathetic, warm hospitality can re-instill in them the belief that their lives have value, that people value them, are happy to be with them and are interested in helping them.

Throughout the coronavirus pandemic, studies have been conducted to determine whether loneliness had escalated as a result and, surprisingly, the 3% increase, as noted in the Journal of the American Medical Association, was viewed as relatively insignificant and essentially consistent. Brigham Young University Professor of Psychology Julianne Holt-Lunstad remarked that a cause might be “a real outpouring of communities really trying to band together and look out for neighbors and for those who might be most vulnerable” during this crisis. It is heartening to observe the heightened connectivity communities have experienced this past year despite the social isolation born of this pandemic.

This camaraderie stems from feeling that although we were distanced from one another in many ways, we were not alone. Whether virtual or in person with safety measures in place, we were strengthened and uplifted by sharing meaningful moments together. We connected with our fellow New Yorkers, community, friends and family, which gave us a sense of support and togetherness.

While we are no longer in lockdown and much of our lives have gone back to “normal,” loneliness remains. We can be the antidote, modeling Abraham our forefather, proactively reaching out to others—making a phone call, offering a helping hand, asking “how are you” with real interest in the response — exchanging being polite for being present, working together towards a cure for the epidemic of loneliness.

Rabbi Meyer Laniado is the associate rabbi of Congregation Kehilath Jeshurun and serves as the leader of its thriving Sephardic community on New York’s Upper East Side.

JEFF BEYDA IF YOU BUILD IT THEY WILL COME

SARINA ROFFE

DO YOU REMEMBER THE MOVIE FIELD OF DREAMS? KEVIN COSTNER PLAYED RAY, WHO KEPT HEARING VOICES THAT TOLD HIM “IF YOU BUILD IT, THEY WILL COME,” SO HE BUILT A BASEBALL DIAMOND. AND PEOPLE CAME FROM FAR AND WIDE TO WATCH BASEBALL.

When parents follow their passion, it is bound to have an effect on their children. Such was the case for Jeff Beyda, who saw his parents Barbara and Joseph Beyda A”H, work tirelessly for the benefit of the community.

“My parents never told me explicitly to involve myself in community work. Because it was such a high priority in our house and we always saw it happening it didn’t need to be said; we lived it,” said Jeff Beyda. “My father was always involved in community work and in helping people. Even after he retired, he went back to school to earn a degree in social work because he loved helping people so much, he wanted to do it full time. Unfortunately, he died at age 57, so only had a few years in practice.”

Joseph Beyda and Albert Ayal with Yithak Rabin
as they work with the Israeli government on resettling Syrian Jews in 1992.

Joseph Beyda is best known for his work as president of Sephardic Bikur Holim (SBH) and affecting its rise from a small organization to a premier mental health organization. Like Costner, Joseph forged forward, believing that if you build a program that serves an important need, people will use it. “My father felt an intense responsibility to meet the needs of our community. He, with others at the time, made tremendous efforts to remove the stigma around mental health, and to their credit it was largely successful. The amazing work done in the mental health field today at SBH is in part a testament to the correctness of his vision, his dedication to the work, and all the committed volunteers and professionals who joined him in the effort, then and now.”

But it was more than that. Jeff watched as his father, along with many other committed community members, work tirelessly to help in the resettlement of the new Syrian immigrants in the early 1990s. “There was so much to do that it was a full-time job for him. The new immigrants were arriving so quickly and needed housing, to learn English, and schools for their children. SBH, to their great credit, led the effort. They even even made hotel arrangements until they could find everyone someplace permanent to live,” he said.

Barbara Beyda, Jeff and his siblings David and Shirley, learned to share Joseph with the community. “When we walked home from synagogue it took an hour because people always stopped him to chat along the way. One day, my dad came home from synagogue upset and sad that some of the newcomers felt their accommodations were inadequate. He took his work very personally,” said Jeff. “Yet, despite all the time and effort he put into his work, he was always there for us, as a family, very present and active in all our lives.”

Jeff went to East Midwood Hebrew Day School and Sephardic High School, finishing his education with a Political Science Degree from Boston University. He met his wife Nava while living in Israel, when they both served in the Israel Defense Forces. Now 52, the couple has two sons and two daughters.

“I watched how my father emphasized working with young people. He made SBH a cool place for youth volunteerism, encouraged them to be involved by visiting the sick in hospitals or at home, and by delivering Shabbat packages to the elderly. Many young people met each other and bonded through the camaraderie,” he said. Here again is an example of how a program was built to inspire youth to volunteer.

Over the years, Jeff has volunteered for organizations he believed in and was passionate about. He was on the national board of Friends of the IDF, helping them raise millions of dollars in the community,

He was on the board at Barkai Yeshiva and was the co-founder of ILEAD with Shilo Plesser (currently run by Richie Chalme) a five-week summer program for high school junior and seniors to motivate future leaders to be active and give back to the community, as well as form a connection to Israel. The ILEAD program is named The Joseph D. Beyda Leadership Program, in memory his father and how important youth development was to him.

SCA Trustees (L-R) Ezra Ashkenazi, Ronny Hersh, Eli Harari, Joe Cayre, Jeff Beyda, Morris Bailey, and Alan Shamah

Jeff agrees that sometimes you need to build programs to address current and future needs of the community despite initial skepticism. For example, when starting The ILEAD program many felt the program, which took teens out of their comfort zone, might be too rustic and challenging for our youth, and parents and kids alike would not be interested. More than 400 teenage boys and girls have since gone through the selective program, which fills up each year with a waiting list.

Jeff is now President of the Sephardic Community Alliance (SCA). He believes in maintaining the Sephardic culture and heritage we all grew up with. Among the core values of SCA are Torah, education, tolerance and respect for others. SCA has 48 community organizations as affiliates.

“I wanted to be part of SCA so my kids could grow up in the same kind of place I did,” said Jeff. “The community has become a much bigger place with many specialized professional groups and institutions. So as a community, we are more capable of handling complicated challenges—but it requires a higher level of coordination and collaboration amongst our rabbis, lay leaders, institutions, and the community at large than it did in the past—and the SCA is very good at facilitating.

And this was more important than ever during the coronavirus pandemic. With so many organizations signed on to its mission, the SCA utilized its resources and network by bringing together rabbis, medical professionals, and community leaders to help give both medical and halachic guidance. They held many webinars that helped inform and advise community institutions and members on effective actions, strategies, and responses.

The ILEAD team: Richie Chalme, Shilo Plesser, Esther Sabbagh, Lillian Amar and Jeff Beyda

Today, the SCA is using that same collaborative model to address other strategic issues. It is helping develop our youth’s ability to be strong and self-assured advocates for Israel. As students attend the nation’s college campuses and encounter anti-Israel, Anti-Semitic and Anti-American sentiments, they are well prepared and have a strong sense of their identity. Social media literacy is also a focus area, to equip people with critical thinking skills that allow them to more easily discern for themselves what is misinformation and to form their own opinions, and not be led astray from the values that have served our community and our families so well.

“While the SCA agenda addresses a variety of existing and emerging challenges, the core of everything we do, as in life, rests on the foundations of our Torah learning. Ensuring that we continue to platform our phenomenal teachers and make them as widely accessible as possible, is and will always be our number one priority. We recently completed a large and lengthy investment with the launching of virtualmidrash.com where our live and recorded classes are available. There is also a free app you can download for mobile access.

“At its core, we hope to inspire and have a respectful, tolerant community that lives in the modern world, while retaining our Torah values, Sephardic heritage and culture and have pride in who we are,” said Jeff. He continued, “Things aren’t the way they are because it’s the way they have been. To preserve and build the great aspects of our community and minimize the negative impacts society delivers to our door, it requires an effort by everyone, it doesn’t just happen by accident. And BH that’s exactly the kind of people that make up our great community. If programs are developed for the benefit of the community as a whole, people will participate.” If you build it, they will come.

A genealogist and historian, Sarina Roffé is the author of Branching Out from Sepharad, Backyard Kitchen: The Main Course, Backyard Kitchen: Mediterranean Salads, and the cooking app, Sarina’s Sephardic Cuisine. Editor of Dorot, Sarina holds a BA in Journalism, and MA in Jewish Studies and an MBA. She is President of the Sephardic Heritage Project, Co-Chair of the Brooklyn Jewish Historical Initiative and Chair of the Sephardic Research Division of JewishGen.

ESTELLE HEDAYA A”H

A SHINING LIGHT EXTINGUISHED

SOMETIME IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT OR EARLY MORNING OF JUNE 24, HALF OF THE CHAMPLAIN TOWERS CONDOMINIUM, LOCATED IN SURFSIDE, FLORIDA COLLAPSED, LEAVING MORE THAN A HUNDRED PEOPLE MISSING. ONE OF THOSE UNACCOUNTED FOR WAS BELOVED COMMUNITY MEMBER ESTELLE HEDAYA A”H, DAUGHTER OF LINDA AND ABIE HEDAYA AND SIBLING TO IKEY AND JILL. THUS BEGAN A NIGHTMARE FOR HER FAMILY AND FRIENDS AND EVERYONE WHO HAD CONNECTIONS TO PEOPLE RESIDING IN THE BUILDING.

Rescue crews worked around the clock in difficult conditions and an Israeli team was brought in to aid the rescue mission. The search lasted almost a month and Estelle was the last person to be found. A friend of hers said, “Of course, she was. She had to make sure everyone got out before she’d leave.”

Her mother described her as “fearless. She would take on any adventure and try anything. She was optimistic and had a love for life. She was happy, funny and always laughing, from the time she was a baby. She was also honest, trustworthy, and had a great work ethic. After 30 years working in the jewelry business, she moved to Miami six years ago, to accept a job with Continental Buying Group and Preferred Jewelers International, where she excelled beyond anyone’s expectations.” Her mom continued, “she was a wonderful daughter, sister, and friend. Everyone loved her.”

There’s a Facebook page “Estelle Hedaya Remembered,” where family members and friends wrote about their favorite memories of Estelle, also known as Stella, and ChaCha, due to her love of dancing. It’s amazing how everyone remembered her exactly the same way—fun, funny, caring, and loving. One person said, “she always saw the glass half full.” Another said, “she never had a lemon, she always had lemonade.” When issues arose, Estelle sought solutions never dwelling on the negative. During the height of the pandemic she initiated a Friday afternoon happy hour on Zoom where many of her friends would meet with their own drink and snacks. They would talk and laugh; it was Estelle’s way to help them overcome the isolation. She saw the good in everything. She never judged anyone. Many people looked to her for advice, and several of them mentioned that now they have to ask themselves, WWED—what would Estelle do?

A man from our community, who was an acquaintance of Estelle’s, said he was sorry that they hadn’t been better friends, but he enjoyed following her online. He felt that “her life was good and the best was yet to come. She was the symbol of determination, optimism and hope.” He added, “All lives are precious, but hers was unique. Few people are as beloved as she was and we see it every day through her friends. Her tragic loss is among the hardest things any of us have ever gone through. We should all aspire to be like her.”

Always a trailblazer, at Estelle’s arayat (traditionally where only men speak), with the blessing of community rabbis, a room was provided for women where female family and friends gave moving speeches. It was mentioned that she was proud to be a member of this community. She loved her heritage and she’d always come home to spend the holidays with her parents. A friend pointed out, “Estelle was a single Syrian girl, grounded in her Syrianess, grounded in her Judaism, and attached to Hashem. She did nothing without Him.”

“It has been devastating to all of us,” her aunt, Regina Elo said. “Estelle was our shining star. She was the joy of all of our lives and we’re going to miss her terribly.”

Her mom concluded, “Estelle was 54, and it’s hard to be single after a certain age, but she accepted it and she was happy. There should be a place where single girls can go to gain the confidence that my daughter had, in order to live life to the fullest. That I feel would be a fitting legacy.”

It’s no surprise that her funeral at Magen David Synagogue in Bensonhurst was overflowing with those who loved her.

FROM BIRTH & BEYOND

DO I NEED POSTPARTUM PHYSICAL THERAPY?

MILLIE SCHWEKY PT, DPT, CPT

CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAD A BABY. YOU READ ALL OF THE BOOKS ABOUT WHAT TO EXPECT WHILE YOU WERE PREGNANT, YOU WENT DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE OF YOUTUBE VIDEOS PREPARING YOU FOR LABOR AND DELIVERY, AND PERHAPS YOU EVEN TOOK CLASSES WITH A DOULA. NOW YOU ARE MOVING ON TO BABY BOOKS AND PREPARING YOURSELF FOR THE EXCITING CHALLENGE OF PARENTING. THIS IS ALL AMAZING AND YOU ARE GOING TO BE THE BEST PARENT FOR YOUR CHILD.

While many women take the initiative to educate themselves on these topics, it is less common that we learn about what to expect during the postpartum period, commonly categorized as the first year after giving birth. Due to the shortfall in postpartum education, most women have questions about what feels normal after giving birth. We go to our six-week check-up and get the “all clear” for activities such as exercise and intimacy, not knowing that things are probably going to feel a bit different.

The female body can take up to eighteen months to fully heal from the miraculous trauma that is pregnancy and childbirth. Growing a mini human is taxing, and can change the body, permanently in some cases. This is where a pelvic floor physical therapist can help. What most people don’t know is that there are physical therapists who specialize in treating the pelvic floor, a muscle group located inside of our hip bones, which have a lot of different functions. These include bowel and bladder control, core stability, organ support, circulation, and sexual function. This muscle group is very important because it is the bridge between the muscles of our hips, core, and back, and has a direct impact on how our bodies perform. Pelvic floor muscles are just like any other muscle in the body. They can be weak, tight, injured, or overused. This means they should be treated just like any other muscles, with proper care and attention.

While pelvic floor therapists can treat a wide variety of diagnoses, one patient population that we commonly treat are women who are pregnant and in the postpartum period. Have you ever had one of the following thoughts?

“I was taking an exercise class and I completely leaked through my leggings, I’m embarrassed to go back.”

“My core feels so weak and my stomach is pooching out. No matter how hard I work out and eat right, it will not change. I feel like my body is broken.”

“When I do my errands I feel like there is something falling out of my pelvis, and it gets worse when I use the restroom.”

“My husband and I are frustrated because we can’t be together the way we used to before we had kids. I wish this pain would just go away.”

While these issues are common, it does not mean that they are normal. Because the female body was designed to carry and give birth to babies, it is easy to assume that the aches and pains that come along with it are just a part of the process. Oftentimes, these common complaints and discomforts can be resolved through a series of pelvic floor therapy visits.

Let’s focus on my patient, Sophia. Sophia came into the office five months after having her second child. She was experiencing leaking urine every time she coughed, sneezed, laughed, or jumped. She was also concerned about the bottom of her belly which seemed to cone when she did exercises, resulting in a “mom pooch.” After evaluating her, we found what we needed to work on in order to get rid of her symptoms. Sophia was dealing with stress urinary incontinence (urinating during certain activities) and diastasis recti (a separation between her abdominal muscles) since she had her first child, and was finally getting the help she needed. After six weeks of consistent visits, Sophia learned how to breathe in an optimal pattern, she improved her posture and muscle strength, we worked on stretching and relaxing the muscles that were tight, and she adapted to doing core exercises with proper form. Sophia is no longer scared to laugh with her friends in case of a leak, is starting to go back to dance cardio classes, and is able to wear fitted clothing without worrying about her belly sticking out.

It is important to know that there is help available and that there are many women who have been able to resolve their symptoms through working with a pelvic floor specialist. When it comes to these conditions, you may be embarrassed to talk about them. It is very common for people to be disconnected from this part of the body as it is an extremely personal area. Because of this, pain and dysfunction in this region can be easier to ignore than to focus on. We owe it to ourselves to get the help we deserve. Patients have a lot to gain from trying pelvic floor PT, as it poses less risk than surgery or other medical treatments.

If you are experiencing any of a following, you may benefit from pelvic floor physical therapy:

• Urinary, fecal, or gas leakage while laughing, coughing, sneezing, or jumping.
• The sudden urge to use the restroom.
• A visible separation between the abdominal muscles, or “mom pooch.”
• Pain during intimacy.
• The feeling of something falling out of your pelvis.
• Scar pain after a C-section or vaginal birth.

There is no need to suffer in silence. You can take charge of your health and well being, and live the life you deserve. Pelvic floor PT can help you transform into your best self and improve quality of life. Reach out to a pelvic floor specialist to help you get back to feeling and looking like the best version of yourself.

Millie Schweky, PT, DPT, CPT is a doctor of physical therapy specializing in pelvic health for women. She practices at Forward Physical Therapy in Brooklyn, NY. As a runner, strength trainer and mother, Millie understands what it takes to return to safe exercise after giving birth and is passionate about helping her patients return to their favorite activities as quickly and safely as possible.

DSN’S PROGRAMS FOR WOMEN INSPIRE A SUMMER OF LEARNING & FUN

DSN HAS BECOME THE PERFECT PLAYGROUND FOR LIVING, LEARNING AND LOVING LIFE! CALEIGH SILVERA, DSN’S ADULT DIRECTOR, EXCITEDLY EXPLAINED, “THIS SUMMER SET THE STANDARD FOR WELL-RUN, AND INFORMATIVE EXPERIENCES FOR OUR COMMUNITY WOMEN.”

The impeccable detailing of DSN’s activities ensured a knowledgeable and gratifying experience for all participants. It started with the wealth of varied activities and culminated into a fabulous summer of everlasting memories.

Our community women love their art. Two separate series of pottery-making took place with instructor Jill Levy Greenberg—one with a kiln and one without. Boasting 24 participants, everyone enjoyed learning and creating, with beautiful pieces to show for it.

Then, a lovely backyard watercolor class with Sylia Aboudi took place using the New Jersey landscape, flowers, or whatever else inspired the painter. For those who are busy during the day, DSN hosted a night class with Jill teaching watercolor and painting in a relaxed environment. DSN member Vicki Lesser rejoiced, “Jill is a teacher with patience and her classes are fun. I had the most relaxing experience at her nighttime watercolor class!”

For the summer’s first book club, members read “Last Summer at the Golden Hotel.” Salads and riveting discussion, led by Jennifer Aboudi, made for a wonderful daytime activity. Allison Safdieh and her daughter, Sophie Safdieh Waingort, attended the book club together. Allison stated, “We had the best time! It was so relaxing, pleasant and intellectually satisfying. We look forward to the coming events.”

DSN’s Short Story Class was a popular event. Seventeen participants showed up for an incredible morning of learning and intellectual entertainment. DSN member Jenny Tawil raved, “It is one of the highlights of my year when DSN comes out with their seasonal list of adult classes. When Sally Taylor Tawil and her short story classes are on the schedule, I’m ecstatic! Sally brings her expertise to life with every short story she reviews at a graduate school level, even for us undergrads. In every class, we are given the background of the author and the context of the piece written. With her gentleness and grace, Sally allows each member of the group to express her own thoughts and emotions and there are always several ‘aha’ moments. It is a true honor to play a part in Sally’s DSN story.”

Julie Botton stated, “I wait all year for Sally’s short story classes. No one quite captures the nuances and depth of a short story like she does. Her class is enlightening, inspiring and interesting every single time!“

Instructors Suzy Haber and Margalit Romano dove into the holistic world of gemstone and mineral healing as certified therapists. They explained the natural and unique healing properties that gemstones offer through traditional and scientific sources. A variety of different emotional and physical symptoms can be improved with this therapeutic practice, including ADD, stress, bone and joint issues, organ issues, kidney stones and many others.

Lesley Kassin’s Stationery Class was called “addicting” by participant Lynn Setyon. Everyone enjoyed learning techniques while listening to music. They gained confidence and made small booklets to take home with them. Each participant said they could have stayed for hours longer and requested more stationery classes in the future.

The winning combination of summer activities continued with an essential oils class given by Liat Kassin and a Persuasive Writing Series with Shelly Forman.

DSN clearly savors creating everlasting memories of summer activities for their members, as is exquisitely reflected in their programs and their members’ responses.

Caleigh Silvera, who coordinated all of the programs, summarized, “It makes all of us at DSN happy and fulfilled to see the community women coming out and connecting. We are confident that we created a winning combination of activities, and will continue to do so for our future DSN endeavors.“

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MAIMONIDES!

BROOKLYN’S HEALTHCARE LEADER CELEBRATES 110 YEARS OF EXCELLENCE WITH STELLAR VIRTUAL GALA; HONORS ALICE ADJMI AS WOMAN OF THE CENTURY

BAILA FEUERSTEIN

ON SEPTEMBER 14TH, MAIMONIDES MEDICAL CENTER WILL MARK ITS MILESTONE 110TH BIRTHDAY WITH A SPECTACULAR, STAR-STUDDED VIRTUAL GALA THAT WILL HONOR THE PAST, CELEBRATE THE PRESENT, AND RECOGNIZE INDIVIDUALS WHO ARE SHAPING THE FUTURE. THE IMPRESSIVE SLATE OF HONOREES INCLUDES MAIMONIDES BOARD CHAIRMAN EUGENE KEILIN AND WIFE JOANNE WITTY; BARCLAYS CENTER AND BROOKLYN NETS CEO JOHN ABBAMONDI; AND RENOWNED COMMUNITY HESED ACTIVIST ALICE ADJMI. ADDING CACHE AND CHARISMA TO THE BROADCAST ARE THE EVENING’S VIRTUAL HOSTS: EMMY AWARD-WINNING BROADCAST PERSONALITY RITA COSBY, AND BROOKLYN-BORN LATE-NIGHT TALK SHOW LUMINARY JIMMY KIMMEL. ACTRESS MARISA TOMEI, WHO WAS BORN AT MAIMONIDES AND WON AN ACADEMY AWARD FOR HER PORTRAYAL OF A QUIRKY BROOKLYN ARCHETYPE IN THE MOVIE MY COUSIN VINNIE, WILL DELIVER BIRTHDAY GREETINGS.

Laying of the Maimonides foundation stone

In 1911, history was made when a women’s Bikur Holim group came together in South Brooklyn to open a small dispensary. Their goal was to provide local immigrant communities with qualified medical care, and education on modern health and sanitary practices. Through the years, their vision and initiative lived on. The small dispensary expanded and merged, changing its name from the New Utrecht Dispensary to Israel Hospital to Israel Zion Hospital, until it grew into the state-of-the-art medical center ultimately renamed Maimonides.

Like those intrepid women of the last century, and Jewish mothers since time immemorial, Gala Honoree Alice Adjmi exemplifies her community’s grand tradition of hesed. Alice is all about helping people. Whether it’s health, social services, education, civics, Torah causes or worthy tzedaka projects of any kind, public or private, Alice’s leadership and tireless efforts improve people’s lives and have a far-reaching impact on the future. This includes her long-standing advocacy and support for the life-saving work of Maimonides.

Alice Adjmi, Maimonides Woman of the Century

In 2016, the year she and husband Harry dedicated Maimonides’ emergency waiting room, Alice literally took a tour of Wonderland. First, she suited up in the surgical “bunny suit” to visit the hospital’s innovative hybrid operating rooms—New York City’s first and still Brooklyn’s only hybrid operating rooms for multi-disciplinary surgery, offering the most advanced imaging technology with virtual reality software. Following her tour of the Heart & Vascular Institute, she visited the world-class Breast Center and Breast Imaging Center of Excellence. Both experiences moved her profoundly, and inspired her to continue her promotion and support. “All of our families have been touched by the heartache of illness and disease. How can we stand by and not do something to try and make it a little easier, a little better, for the next family facing these challenges?”

The Bikur Holim ladies—early founders of Maimonides Medical Center

Alice champions Maimonides as the community’s unsung hero and is quick to debrief the notion that anything located in Manhattan is somehow superior. “Anyone who has ever had an unsatisfactory experience at a Manhattan hospital can tell you, location is no guarantee of outcome,” she asserts. “When the unthinkable happens, it’s not the location of the hospital that matters but our proximity to it that makes all the difference. When injury or illness strikes, we don’t waste precious time in traffic to get across the river. We go to Maimonides, the life-saving resource that we are fortunate to have right here, in our own backyard.”

Suited up for the hybrid operating rooms. L to R: Ken Gibbs, President & CEO; Alice Adjmi; Dr. Greg Ribakove, Chief of Cardiothoracic Surgery; Erminia Rivera, Maimonides Trustee

Nationally recognized for clinical excellence and world-class physicians, Maimonides serves as the tertiary care hub for patients across the borough, including the Brooklyn Sephardic community. It serves the community in every stage of life with compassion for its needs and unique respect for its laws and traditions. In fact, it is the only hospital in the city to employ a full-time team of Sephardic patient representatives to care for and expedite the needs of community patients in the emergency room and on the wards. The team members, Isaac Sabbagh, Gabe Haber, Albert Levy, Jack Azar and Morris Rahmey, constantly go above and beyond to help every patient they encounter. They are true healthcare heroes.

Alice Adjmi chats with Dr. Patrick Borgen, Chair of Surgery
and Director of the Breast Center

“This is an exciting time to be part of Maimonides,” says Rabbi Heshy Augenbaum, the hospital’s seasoned Chief Development Officer, who works closely with community leadership and has consulted on countless projects and organizational initiatives that have benefited the Sephardic community—and Jewish communities worldwide. “The healthcare landscape is changing and we are changing with it, transforming from a ‘medical center’ into a comprehensive ‘system of care’ with multiple campuses, physician practices across Brooklyn, and a virtual care offering. Our vision is still to provide the best care available anywhere, and growth plays a key role in that.”

Bar mitzvah party for first-borns of the hospital, 1920’s

Maimonides just completed its affiliation with New York Community Hospital in Midwood. Its new Doctors Pavilion on Ninth Avenue and 48th Street—a project overseen by Trustee Jack A. Hidary—brings more than 130 providers and 35 specialty and primary care practices together under one roof. The construction of a separate new pediatric emergency room on the main campus will increase the existing ER by 47,000 square feet. And it continues to implement programs that keep people healthy and out of the hospital, including health outreach initiatives with strategic partners like the Brooklyn Nets and the Brooklyn Cyclones. “Although the COVID-19 pandemic is still with us and we’re not out of the woods yet, our birthday gala is a meaningful celebration of hope and promise for the future,” says Rabbi Augenbaum. “We’re 110 years young, it’s the party of the century, and what better way to mark the occasion than by appreciating Mrs. Alice Adjmi as our Woman of the Century and recognizing her among the visionary individuals securing the future of healthcare in Brooklyn for the next 110 years.”

To learn more about Maimonides’ 110th Birthday Virtual Gala, make a sponsorship gift, put an ad in the digital journal, and watch the gala broadcast, visit the event website, www.110Birthday.org.

HOUSEWIVES AND HEALTHCARE HEROES GO TO BAT FOR MAIMONDIES

This summer, Maimonides renewed its commitment to the borough of Brooklyn and to promoting the health and well-being of the community at large by naming the iconic Cyclones Stadium in Coney Island, now known as Maimonides Park. Events and festivities at the park throughout the season were focused on health education and engaging the public in the celebration of the hospital’s 110th birthday. On August 12th, cheering fans packed the stands as Maimonides’ second-annual Battle for Brooklyn celebrity softball game saw the cast of Bravo’s Real Housewives of New Jersey, led by team captain Dolores Catania, go head-to-head with the Maimonides All Stars team, led by Chair of Surgery and Director of the Breast Center, Dr. Patrick Borgen. The Housewives and Husbands, along with 77 WABC Radio’s Sid Rosenberg, and former New York Giant Tiki Barber, trounced the All Stars 10-6, but it was nevertheless a victory for Maimonides as proceeds of the charitable event benefited the Breast Center, and a sensational time was had by all. Fans and players sang a rousing chorus of Happy Birthday to Maimonides as fireworks lit up the sky. Radio legend “Brooklyn’s Own” Joe Causi emceed the fun, and Cross River Bank was the magnanimous sponsor of the game.

Baila Feuerstein is the Director of Donor Communications/Development at Maimonides Medical Center.

AN UNFORGETTABLE EVENING

PROPEL CELEBRATES ITS ACCOMPLISHMENTS

IT WAS TRULY AN UNFORGETTABLE EVENING FOR PROPEL, AS THE NONPROFIT ORGANIZATION CELEBRATED ITS ACCOMPLISHMENTS ON JULY 14TH AT THE BEAUTIFUL HOME OF SHARON AND MICHAEL HADDAD (VICE PRESIDENT OF PROPEL). OVER 200 GUESTS—INCLUDING COMMUNITY LEADERS AND PROPEL BOARD MEMBERS, PROFESSIONALS AND CLIENTS—GATHERED AT THE EVENT. THE EVENING WAS WONDERFULLY ARRANGED TO RECOGNIZE TWO WOMEN WHO HAVE DONE SO MUCH TO BENEFIT OUR COMMUNITY—ALICE ADJMI AND DR. GAYLE KROST (VICE PRESIDENT OF PROPEL).

An upbeat video montage set to the song “Let’s Get Down to Business” opened the program. On the large screen, the montage portrayed the achievements of many PROPEL clients and reviewed PROPEL programs and events. The guests saw how PROPEL provides career guidance and invests in women to allow them to develop professions, and promotes “Smart Giving” by making an investment in a woman’s career that has a return that continues to grow for years to come. By investing in women, PROPEL is investing in the families and future of our community.

Hostess, Sharon Haddad, warmly welcomed the guests and thanked and acknowledged honorees and the keynote speaker. Sharon then introduced Jacqueline Harary, co-president of PROPEL, and noted that PROPEL is one of the most relevant charities in our community. Jacqueline described the evolution of the organization over the past five years. At its inception, PROPEL focused on enabling women to obtain certificated careers; now, the organization is helping women enter graduate programs. Jacqueline declared that PROPEL’s mission of improving the lives of so many people speaks to her, and she is very proud of the growth of the organization.

Jacqueline introduced our keynote speaker, Adela Cojab. Adela’s inspirational speech described her family’s move to Deal, New Jersey from Mexico when she was a young child, her education at Hillel Yeshiva, and standing up against anti-Semitism at New York University. Most powerful was Adele’s acknowledgement of her mother as her role model who encouraged her to always achieve. The crowd cheered as she announced that she is starting law school this fall.

Alice Adjmi was presented with the PROPEL Community Woman of the Year Award in gratitude for her outstanding dedication to the health and wellbeing of our community members and all that she accomplished during the COVID-19 pandemic. Gladys Haddad, President of Magen David Yeshivah, spoke beautifully about Alice’s desire for everyone around her to be happy, and her inspiring and empathetic nature. Gladys described Alice’s dedication to our community during the pandemic and introduced a surprise video from Amanda Kloots, a person who Alice impacted during the pandemic, by enabling her to see her husband in the hospital before he passed away. A video about Alice, featuring Ivor and Robin Braka (PROPEL board member), Freda Sutton, and Mazal Liniado of Shalom Foods, further illustrates Alice’s impact on community members and her massive generosity.

Dr. Gayle Krost was presented with the PROPEL Lifetime Achievement Award in gratitude for lifetime advancement of education in our community. PROPEL Board Member Marcy Feldman delivered an impactful speech introducing Gayle, a philanthropist who has done so much for our community, and acknowledging the importance of education instilled in Gayle by her parents. Gayle was encouraged to pursue a career as she attended New York University School of Dentistry and became an endodontist, while maintaining strong family values. A video featuring community leaders Ezra S. Ashkenazi (PROPEL co-founder and board member), Sammy Saka and Elaine Parker further highlighted the important role Gayle plays in our community through her leadership roles at many key organizations, including Hillel Yeshiva, Children’s Cancer Center and PROPEL.

Co-Executive Director of PROPEL Alissa Shams thanked the board, the advisory board, the newly formed young professional board, and the professional and marketing team of PROPEL for their tireless devotion to PROPEL’s mission and clients. Alissa discussed PROPEL’s synergy with other community organizations and beyond, including Sephardic Bikur Holim, UJA Federation of NY and Touro College. A video presentation portraying collaboration with Touro featured PROPEL clients currently enrolled in programs there prefaced Allissa’s introduction of two extraordinary PROPEL clients.

Probably the moment of the evening which allowed the guests to understand the instrumental work of PROPEL was when graduates, Lendy Sardar Hanono, a PROPELed client, and Judith Betesh, a functional nutritionist, came up to the podium to passionately tell their stories. Under the mentorship of PROPELed, Lendy enrolled in and completed Touro’s Jewish Education and Special Education masters program, and when asked to describe herself, she said, “I love learning!” Lendy is a shining star, and we look forward to her sharing her radiance, wisdom and passion with the students in the community. Judith has a depth of knowledge about promoting great health through eating well. If she doesn’t know something she will search for answers in all the right places because client health is an essential focus of her work. Judith is generous, loving and kind; however, it is her strength that truly inspires. We are very proud of these incredible women, Lendy and Judith!

Co-President of PROPEL Haim Dabah then offered some encouraging words about where PROPEL has taken the community in terms of promoting the concept of a second household income and highlighted the new initiatives of the organization, including PROPELed, the Victoria Aronow PROPEL List, community high school engagement, and the PROPEL Mentorship program.

Harry Adjmi, one of our community’s well-known leaders, closed the event and passionately recognized many sponsorships and donations to PROPEL.

A special thank you to Norma Cohen Productions, Seuda Foods and Lauren Ancona for helping to make the evening such a successful one.

PROPEL is extremely appreciative of all the community members who support the organization and all the donations that were pledged at the event. PROPEL offers career guidance and some financial scholarships to cover part of the cost for training and educational programs and exemplifies “smart giving.” By investing in women, each donation evolves into a salary which can help support a family, and eases the financial burden which is a reality in today’s world. As the Rambam proclaims, teaching a person a trade is one of the highest forms of tzedakah. PROPEL is committed to the financial success and future of the community by inspiring women to feel confident in careers that they choose.

If you are interested in a career, please reach out to PROPEL and we can help you take the steps to fulfill your professional goals and dreams.. PROPEL 646-494-0822|info@thepropelnetwork.org | Instagram @PropelNetwork

C.A.R.E FOR SPECIAL NEEDS CHILDREN

PROVIDING SUPPORT FOR EVERY FAMILY MEMBER

Imagine a family. Picture bone-deep burdened parents, edgy siblings, and a child with special needs that aren’t being adequately met, despite the best efforts of the parents. Depleted, the parents share their struggles with their friends, and eventually one confidante mentions C.A.R.E.

“Have you tried C.A.R.E. for Special Children? It’s an amazing organization, they help children with special needs and their families. You have to check it out, it’s not like the other programs.”

The family walks in for their first appointment. They are greeted by a smiling face, kind words, and an intake process as warm as a dear friend’s hug. Here, they find compassion, empathy, a comprehensive list of government services that is clearly explained, an array of therapeutic modalities discussed at length, and a plan of action for the best special education and options for extra support in the classroom, mental health services and intervention, physical aid with daily activities, a community of families with struggles just like theirs, a year-round calendar of social events with other C.A.R.E. families that help everyone recharge and reconnect—and so much more. The real novelty with C.A.R.E. is that every family member will receive personalized support.

It begins to dawn on the family: we, all of us, are receiving care. Our needs are holistic, because the ramifications of raising a child with special needs are global—and this organization knows our struggle; this organization sees us. The options are explained. The information is documented and tailored to the needs of the family. And then C.A.R.E. proceeds with the next unique step: the organization provides everything.

C.A.R.E. does all of the initial legwork and then follows up to help the family integrate and fine-tune the solution package they create. The family doesn’t have to go chasing after in-network therapists, doesn’t have to drag through the lists of possible schools in which they may enroll their child, doesn’t have to worry about being alone to cope with the next family crisis or emergency situation. The whole family is addressed in a laser-focused, tailored manner that could only come from years of experience gifted by someone who has walked this path already—someone who knows your need because they lived it themselves—someone like C.A.R.E.

COVID-19
COVID-19—just thinking about it is triggering for many. School shutdowns, ZOOM, kids at home, work from home, All this conjures up an image of chaos and confusion.

For the typical family, adjusting to the new day-to-day was a struggle. Figuring out devices for every school aged child, headphones, quiet spaces, supplies, class schedules, a full day buffet of non-stop food. Now amplify that tremendously for families who have children with special needs.

These kids can not just sit in front of a screen independently and listen to a teacher go on and on about a topic. Some of them need constant supervision, hand-over-hand for the therapists on the screen, and strict schedules and structure to stay calm and happy. Something as simple as a wi-fi outage or a dead battery can send the child into a frenzy. The lack of the daily routine and outside help for many of these families was debilitating and draining.

And while the government agencies, nursing agencies, therapists and schools shut down—C.A.R.E. stayed open. C.A.R.E. made sure that moms had a place to call in this time of great need—a listening ear, someone to hear their issues and help troubleshoot problems that came up. When families needed support, guidance or a specific doctor or therapist, C.A.R.E. rose to the challenge and succeeded.

C.A.R.E. DAY 2021
On July 4th, C.A.R.E. held its annual event featuring a softball tournament, old timer’s game, barbecue, rides and games for the children.

The event was led by Abe Saka along with Raymond Esses and Morris Kassin. Hundreds of community members attended and showed their support to the organization while enjoying one of the most beautiful family days of the summer! Adults and children alike were entertained, inspired and connected, while learning about one of the most compelling community organizations in recent history — C.A.R.E. for Special children.

If you would like to volunteer or get involved with C.A.R.E. please contact them at 718.975.7171 or email info@careforspecial.org.

Read Jewish Image Magazine Online – September 2021

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BRINGING PERPETRATORS OF HATE CRIMES TO JUSTICE

ANTI-SEMITIC CRIMES OF ALL KINDS ARE ON THE RISE, JEWS ARE BEING TARGETED REGULARLY ON THE STREETS OF NEW YORK, YET BRINGING THE CRIMINALS WHO COMMIT THESE ACTS TO JUSTICE HAS BECOME INCREASINGLY CHALLENGING.

As the courts and the NYPD deal with frustrating bail reform laws, they are left essentially with a revolving door criminal justice system that allows hate crime perpetrators to be released back onto the streets within 24 to 48 hours.

Bigotry and intolerance must be stamped out. Tangible steps must be taken to combat all hate crimes. It’s time to further expand our efforts in the fight against these crimes through the civil court system.

Gerstman Schwartz LLP, a NYC-based law firm, is prepared to fight for hate-crime victims through the civil courts. The law firm will file civil lawsuits on behalf of any hate-crime victim based on a wide range of civil causes of action including assault and battery, property damage, trespassing, infliction of emotional distress, civil rights actions, and more.

If a case is won on behalf of the plaintiff, as is expected, Gerstman Schwartz LLP will have the power to garnish the wages of the defendants or put a lien on their bank accounts. The law firm is committed to exposing those who commit these heinous crimes, and will work with civil rights attorneys to ensure that the promise of civil rights and equal justice applies to all, including the American Jewish community. Gerstman Schwartz LLP will also expend resources to track and expose the activities of hate groups and domestic anti-Semitic extremists.

Assemblyman Simcha Eichenstein will join them in this effort. Assemblyman Eichenstein is publicizing this new lawsuit initiative as a viable resource for victims to fight back against anti-Semitic attacks, physical attacks, and attacks on property.

“I urge all victims of anti-Semitic hate crimes to step forward and begin the process of filing suits against their attackers,” Eichenstein stated. “As all other avenues of justice are being stymied and perpetrators are not being prosecuted as they should be, filing a civil lawsuit is an additional tool that can be used to ensure that justice is served. We must be sure that hate crime perpetrators, who are driven by irrepressible inner hate, do not act again and that others will be deterred from doing the same. Due to this new initiative, victims of hate crimes will no longer have to suffer while their attackers get released with a slap on the wrist. Now they can fight back and sue their attackers in the civil court system. Justice must be served.”

“This issue is very personal to our firm,” said Bradley Gerstman, Esq, Founding Partner of Gerstman Schwartz LLP, “and we will not rest until we seek out and legally destroy every enemy of the Jewish people in the court of law. The best defense is an aggressive offense. Our ancestors came to the United States to escape the pain and suffering they endured in other parts of the world. We will not allow anti-Semites and thugs to brutalize and terrorize our people here in this country. Our firm will be relentless in seeking out these thugs with a team of private investigators who will use advanced technology to bring them to justice.”

“Our lawsuit campaign,” said David Schwartz, Esq, Founding Partner of Gerstman Schwartz LLP, “will bring a barrage of lawsuits against those who commit hateful and violent anti-Semitic crimes. We will make them answer for their crimes. Our goal is to win as many cases as we can and to start a movement. As we get judgments against these defendants, we will garnish their wages, freeze their bank accounts, put liens on their properties, have their cars repossessed, contact their business associates, and find any and all means to legally pursue them so that they will regret having targeted the Jewish people.”

SUMMER GARDEN RECIPES

FRESH HERBS, RIPE TOMATOES & LUXURIOUS SWEET CORN

SARINA ROFFE

Pesto alla Genovese is a Genoan sauce traditionally made from basil, crushed garlic, pine nuts, coarse salt and Parmesan cheese, all blended with olive oil. Basil has a flavor between cloves and licorice. It is popular to prepare basil pesto in the summer because it grows well and has a delightful fragrance. I go into my summer herb garden and grab whatever is there, merging the flavors into an exciting herb pesto that stands out. I typically leave out the cheese, for a parve recipe.

Give me my fresh herbs and send me to heaven. My go-to fresh herbs are basil, mint, parsley, oregano rosemary, thyme and dill. I almost always have these in the fridge. Mint? I am a Mediterranean cook, need I say more? The flavor is fairly intense, and I love it in soups and salads and also in my pesto.

Besides summer tomatoes and basil, my most cherished summer vegetable is that silky, luxurious sweet corn that appears in farmers markets in August. Sweet Silver Queen corn (grown in the Northeast) delivers a mouthful of succulence in each bite.

The unusual sweetness occurs because the Silver Queen does not turn the sugar into starch during growth. In one serving of corn on the cob, there are 7.5 grams of carbohydrates and 1.5 grams of protein. The total fat in corn on the cob is 0.8 gram, and there is also 0.8 gram of dietary fiber per serving. Corn on the cob consists mostly of carbohydrates in comparison to fat and protein. There are 44 calories per serving of corn on the cob.

When I grew up, there was only one way to make corn. Boil water, add the corn, bring water back to a boil, and cook for 5 minutes. We always ate the corn with our barbecue by brushing it with butter or margarine and sprinkling it with salt. It was corn in its most natural form and as kids, we could never get enough of its delicious sweetness!

Lately, I have become a lover of grilled corn. There are so many ways to prepare it. Some recipes for grilling corn on the cob involve grilling it in the husk, inside heavy duty aluminum foil or without the husk on the grill. The primary difference between using the husk or foil and leaving the corn unwrapped has to do with the texture of the corn. Grilling corn on the cob in aluminum foil requires wrapping the corn in the foil and grilling it for approximately 20 minutes on medium heat.

Grilling the corn without the husks takes less time, about 10-12 minutes. Basically, you brush the corn with a dressing, such as butter, salt and pepper, and grill, turning it every 2-3 minutes until tender and slightly charred.

Following is my recipe for herb pesto as well as two variations on grilled corn, one with and one without the husks. I encourage you to experiment with toppings and spices. Parsley, basil and mint are great fresh spices. You can add these after grilling or mix with butter or mayonnaise dressing. I also love rolling the corn in parmesan cheese, when eating with grilled salmon. There are so many ways to grill the corn and each has its own tangy flavor.

Of course, you can enjoy the corn, just by boiling it, as my mom did! For corn salad recipes, please see my cookbook Backyard Kitchen: Mediterranean Salads, available on Amazon. I particularly love tomatoes and corn, with just a taste of red onion and a simple oil and lemon dressing. Other recipes can be found on my website sarinassephardiccuisine.com.

HOME-GROWN SUMMER HERB PESTO

Ingredients
• Bunch of fresh basil leaves
• 6-8 cloves of fresh garlic
• Bunch of fresh parsley leaves
• 4 tablespoons fresh thyme leaves
• Bunch of mint leaves
• ½ cup pine or walnuts (optional)
• ½ teaspoon pepper
• ½ teaspoon kosher salt
• ¼ cup olive oil

Directions
Place basil, garlic, parsley, mint, and thyme in food processor. Add salt and pepper and nuts, if adding. Turn on high and when herbs are chopped, slowly drizzle in olive oil. Store in tightly sealed jar in refrigerator up to 2 weeks. To freeze, pour into jar, top with olive oil, and seal tightly. Freezes for up to three months.

MUSTARD GARLIC AND HERB GRILLED CORN IN HUSKS

Ingredients
• 4 ears corn on the cob
• 2 tablespoons margarine or butter, softened
• 2 tablespoons Dijon mustard
• 1 clove garlic, minced
• ½ teaspoon each of basil, oregano and thyme

Directions
Heat grill to medium heat. Pull back husks of corn, being careful to leave husks attached at bottom of each ear. Remove and discard corn silk. Rinse corn.
Combine margarine, mustard, garlic and seasonings. Spread about 1 tablespoon of the mustard mixture onto each ear of corn. Rewrap husks around corn. Grill 15 to 20 minutes or until corn is tender, turning frequently to prevent husks from burning. Serve warm.

NO HUSK GRILLED MEXICAN CORN

Ingredients
• 4 ears sweet corn
• ¼ cup onion, chopped
• 1 tablespoon apple cider vinegar
• ½ cup mayonnaise
• ½ teaspoon chili powder
• ½ teaspoon salt
• ¼ teaspoon pepper

Directions
Heat grill to medium heat. Pull husks off corn and rinse. Combine remaining ingredients. Brush about 1 tablespoon of the mixture onto each ear of corn. Grill 10 minutes, turning every 3-4 minutes until corn is tender and slightly charred. Serve warm.

A genealogist and historian, Sarina Roffé is the author of Backyard Kitchen: The Main Course, Backyard Kitchen: Mediterranean Salads, and the cooking app, Sarina’s Sephardic Cuisine. She also wrote Branching Out from Sepharad (Sephardic Heritage Project, 2017), and is the editor of Dorot, Sarina holds a BA in Journalism, and MA in Jewish Studies and an MBA. Sarina is President of the Sephardic Heritage Project, Co-Chair of the Brooklyn Jewish Historical Initiative and Chair of the Sephardic Research Division of JewishGen.

COMMUNITY OUTREACH AT ITS BEST

KEEPING AVENUE P BEAUTIFUL

ON SUNDAY, JULY 11, THE FBI NEW YORK CITIZENS ACADEMY AND ALUMNI ASSOCIATION BROUGHT THE KINGS HIGHWAY BEAUTIFICATION ASSOCIATION, THE NYPD COMMUNITY OUTREACH EXPLORER PROGRAM, AND THE FBI’S COMMUNITY OUTREACH EXPLORER PROGRAM TOGETHER FOR A GRAFFITI REMOVAL PROJECT ALONG THE AVENUE P CORRIDOR OF MIDWOOD, BROOKLYN. THE EVENT PROVED MORE SUCCESSFUL THAN EVEN THOSE WHO PLANNED IT ANTICIPATED. IT’S A DAY EVERYONE WILL REMEMBER FOR A VERY LONG TIME.

Working together, volunteers from community organizations braved the heat to clean up graffiti on neighborhood buildings and then painting them to make sure none of the graffiti was visible. The street now looks so much better and brighter thanks to all of their hard work. Thanks to Matthew Pintchic’s more than generous donation of paint and supplies everyone in attendance stayed busy.

Community Activist Nemo Bussu stopped by to help out. He grabbed a brush and immediately joined the volunteers. Jack Kishk, President of the FBI New York Citizens Academy Alumni Association, Victor Mirontschuk, Second Vice-President, Gabriel Gingishvili, Treasurer, NYPD Officer Marciano, Officer Lauren Au, and FBI Community Outreach Specialists Evelyn Vera and Michael Dougherty also pitched in.

Calvin, from Ace Cleaning Services, joined the effort, declaring, “Avenue P is special and filled with love. We are so proud of the local shop owners and residents who shop locally, caring for our streets.” The area shopkeepers were so appreciative of the hard work, one of them asked if we could paint his store!

This is the first joint effort between the 61 Precinct’s Explorer’s Program and the FBI Explorer’s Program. Those who run the FBI Explorer’s Program know the importance of educating young people on the relevance of community effort, and asking for their active involvement in taking care of their neighborhoods.

Partnering with the NYPD, the FBI helps young people understand how the local NYPD programs interact with the FBI’s efforts on crime prevention. Community safety and crime prevention are always top priorities for both entities.

We hope the success of this joint effort will inspire local residents to come together to build a better community. Every project, no matter how big or small, brings neighborhood people from all walks of life together, working towards a common goal.

WHY YOU NEED AN EXCLUSIVE LISTING

MELANIE KISHK

SUPPOSE YOU OWN A FULLY STOCKED CLOTHING STORE ON MAIN STREET, AND A FRIEND APPROACHES YOU ONE DAY ASKING YOU TO SELL HER BLOUSES FOR $100 EACH. THE SHIRTS SEEM OVERPRICED, BUT SHE SAYS YOU WILL EARN A COMMISSION ON EACH SALE. THEN SHE TELLS YOU SHE’S ALREADY MADE THE SAME DEAL WITH SIX OTHER CLOTHING STORES IN TOWN. YOU WILL BE COMPETING WITH ALL OF THEM TO SELL THE SAME MERCHANDISE. DO YOU ACCEPT THE DEAL?

I hope your answer is “No!” Your main goal in sales is to turn your inventory into cash. If you are competing with everyone else in town to sell the same merchandise, chances are slim you will come out a winner. You’re much better off if you are the exclusive marketer of a product.

My husband, Jack, and I use this example to explain the importance of having an exclusive listing. We want to be the hired real estate agents with the legal right to sell a piece of property. We need an agreement between us and the seller stating that we have the sole right to market the home and are guaranteed a commission when the property sells. Once we have that agreement, we can properly manage the listing and all of the buyers’ agents who would like to show it.

Some property owners are leery of listing a property exclusively with one realtor. Instead, they want to sell their homes as open listings, because they worry about missing an offer from another agent, or they want to have the option of selling their property themselves—for sale by owner (FSBO) to avoid paying a commission. In reality, it’s in their best interests to list exclusively through us. Here are several good reasons why.

Owner’s lack of experience – The average homeowner has no experience selling a home. There can be hundreds of details involved in listing a house, from timing to renovations, to staging, to marketing to photography. There are questions that they don’t know they should ask, such as “Are there violations?” or “Is there a clear title?”

We know the right price to ask for your home – We are seasoned professionals and know how to read the market to come up with the perfect asking price for your home. We find that most sellers price their houses too high and then have to slash that number when they realize their mistake, costing them thousands of dollars.

We know how to market your home – If you are a homeowner trying to sell your house yourself, how do you market it? Only agents can list properties on a Multiple Listing Service (MLS), the primary, private database where realtors look for properties. Since realtors are constantly sharing information on an MLS, they reach many more potential buyers.

We won’t panic when chaos sets in – An open listing allows many agents to list and show the house, each one of them trying to get the sale. There can be different prices, different hours for showings, and different agents showing up simultaneously. We once saw a house with more than 20 agents trying to show it. It was like a three-ring circus, and the homeowner was overwhelmed.

FSBOs may not know which offer to accept – It’s exciting when you get an offer to buy your home, however it’s confusing when you get a dozen, each with its own requirements.

“I’ll give you $1.9 million, with a conventional loan, an appraisal, and contingencies.”

“We can’t offer more than $1.7 million, but we can put 50% down.”

“We can do $1.6 million in cash. Let me know by this afternoon.”

“We just accepted an offer on our house and can give you $1.75 million guaranteed in ten days with no contingencies.”

Do you know which offer is best? Most sellers don’t, but we do—because we have years of experience.

Selling a home is time consuming – Most real estate agents spend hours on the phone or emailing or texting, or conferencing with clients. We are available 24/7 to answer questions. We spend money on photography, videography, and marketing because those things help us earn a profit when a property sells. We are laser-focused on selling a piece of property for the best price possible in the shortest time, and our loyal clients keep coming back time and again.

When a seller decides to sell their house on their own, that FSBO listing is like the blouse in the clothing store. Where’s the benefit to us in sinking a ton of time and resources into a potentially overpriced property we may or may not be able to sell? We may put some token effort into selling the property if we have the time, but it’s not a priority.

Buyers prefer exclusive listings – Experienced buyers feel more confident making an offer on a property if they know an agent has an exclusive listing. It tells them that a professional real estate expert will be there for them when issues come up. And issues always come up!

Exclusive listings save money – This really is the bottom line. Most people listing a property FSBO may think they are saving money. They forget the importance and expense of marketing and listing, photography, staging, closing costs, commission to the buyer’s agent, taxes, attorney’s fees, and more. Some of these costs may be included for free in an exclusive agreement with an agent. If they aren’t, the homeowner pays for them.

A FSBO listing may be able to avoid paying a percentage of the sale that would have gone to the listing agent, but according to the National Association of Realtors, FSBO homes sell, on average, for 11% less than homes sold by agents.

You trust your car repair and your dry cleaning, and your appliance maintenance to professionals. You ask doctors for medical advice and lawyers for legal advice. So why would you think you should sell your home without the expertise of a listing agent? It’s most likely the most expensive thing you will ever sell.

Let a reputable broker do what she does best—sell your house for the best price quickly without the stress involved in a private sale or a three ring open listing circus. Buyers and sellers both want to complete a deal with good will and good fortune. An experienced and professional real estate broker can help buyers and sellers reach that goal.

Century 21’s Melanie Kishk is a full-time Broker/Owner. Her team consists of top performing real estate agents serving Brooklyn, New York and the surrounding communities.

RICKY COHEN – FOR THE LOVE OF PEOPLE

SARINA ROFFE

Gemillut Hasadim (giving to others) isn’t something a person does—It’s who he/she is.

FROM THE TIME HE WAS A CHILD, RICKY COHEN WATCHED AND LEARNED FROM THE EFFORTS OF HIS FATHER ABE COHEN A”H, ON BEHALF OF THE COMMUNITY, AS WELL AS THE EFFORTS OF OTHER COMMUNITY LEADERS. ABE AND HIS CONTEMPORARIES WERE VISIONARIES; LEADING, INSPIRING AND BUILDING OUR COMMUNITY AND ITS MEMBERS.

Ricky remembers, “I was fortunate, from time to time, to be in the room when my father, along with the congregation’s lay leaders, Chief Rabbi Jacob Kassin zt’l, and later, Hacham Baruch zt’l, discussed complex community issues, many of which would shape the community with an impact for decades to come.”

For 60 years, from the time Abe Cohen was 34 years old, he was involved in the leadership at Shaare Zion Congregation. As Chairman of the Building Committee in the 1950’s, he built our cherished Shaare Zion, a several year project, against a backdrop of extraordinary challenges. He doubled the synagogue in size in the early 90’s. At that point, he was 80 years old and faced substantial opposition on the new and ambitious project. The project was completed in four years and paid for in full a handful of years later. At the age of 94, before he became ill, Abe was walking around with the plans to expand the synagogue further.

“Dad built us. He taught how to embrace the needs of the community. He got stronger as he got older,” Ricky describes. “Decisions were based on what was best for the long term for the community. Leadership means you don’t look at today or tomorrow to frame a decision. Instead, you look at today, tomorrow and 25 years from now and that shapes the decision-making process.”

Geri, A”H, Ricky’s mom, was her husband’s strength, standing with him, side-by-side and providing him with unlimited love and support. She was a humble powerhouse in her own right. Quietly working with many Sephardic Bikur Holim (SBH) cases, day after day, with zero fanfare. When the latest waves of Syrian Jews arrived, she spent months taking people back and forth to government offices, doctors and helped them with whatever they needed to do in a country where they had no experience. Her warmth, beauty and fluent Arabic were a source of immeasurable comfort.

“I also learned from Joseph Beyda A”H, who was President of SBH. At that time, SBH was very successful, primarily focused on visiting the sick and helping the poor. Joseph promoted the vision of SBH as a mental health organization, which he felt would address a widespread and deep-felt need and transform the community for the better. Although he received little support for this major refocus, he persevered and within a short time his dream was realized. Today SBH is first and foremost, a multi-faceted mental health organization, while providing other services as well.”

Ricky Sutton, Harry Adjmi, Ricky Cohen, Alan Maleh and Jack Mann

In 1977, Ricky went to Israel after high school to learn in yeshivah. While there, he was struck by idealistic Israelis, people who sacrificed for their country and its people, and by an attitude taken from Israel’s founding father, David Ben-Gurion, that framed his thinking. The difficult we do first; the impossible takes a little longer.

While in Israel, Ricky became committed to Torah learning and when he returned to Brooklyn, he began teaching Torah insights to teens. His words enabled their individual growth and ultimately provided them with a love for Torah and Torah learning, and the tools for personal and career success. The popular informal gatherings also resulted in several couples meeting and getting married.

He soon became an advisor for Yeshiva University seminar and later, led the program. The emotional well-being of the student was the first priority providing a platform for building a relationship with Hashem and building a lifestyle committed to giving and growing. A request from Rabbi Avner Taler from the Yeshivah of Flatbush to teach a small group of senior boys became the genesis for a curriculum on personal and career leadership based in Torah. From there, other volunteer teaching opportunities abounded at Magen David Yeshivah and Sephardic High School, as well as a course at Baruch College in business ethics and social responsibility.

Over the years, Ricky inspired the minds of thousands of men and women and provided them with the skills needed for individual and career success. His “Risk to Succeed” workshop was implemented by community organizations and industry leaders, such as Chase Bank and the United States Navy. His “Risk to Succeed” book has been read by thousands and translated into other languages.

Ricky’s success as a young entrepreneur was a result of the emphasis that he placed on risk taking and personal leadership. He infused company employees with an entrepreneurial spirit and the tools to achieve on unprecedented levels.

In 1988, Maurice Hedaya introduced Ricky and his close friend Ezra Ashkenazi to a small group of Syrian immigrants who shared information about the plight of the Jews in Syria, their suffering and persecution. Even though they were only 28 years old, Ezra and Ricky sprang into action helping Dr. Mayer Ballas and Albert Ayal create a greater level of structure and organization for SOSJ (Save Our Syrian Jews). It later became the Council for the Rescue of Syrian Jews (CRSJ) with an expanded committee filled with professionals such as Alice Sardell, Marcos Zalta, lobbyist Suri Kasirer, amongst other community volunteers. From an office based in Conway Stores (which Ricky’s father founded), with a concentrated effort of political mobilization and multi-point, international pressure, in 1992, 3,500 Syrian Jews were successfully airlifted to New York.

“Arevut (responsibility to one’s community and responsibility to the world) defines us, empowers us and obligates us,” said Ricky. “We have a collective destiny and responsibility. Borei Olam designed our Jewish people that way, and each community with its respective level of obligation and opportunity.”

Ricky focuses his volunteerism on the community. “I am hardwired to give, and I love people and learning. I wanted to focus on my own community. Informal education with a strong emphasis on Torah learning and sharing ideas helps people amass knowledge, be inspired and acquire the tools to grow.”

Ricky’s approach to hesed is to establish ambitious, long term, goals realized over time through a rigorous day-to-day plan.

In 2008, Barkai Yeshiva was struggling. It was a difficult time for Ricky—his father had recently died, his mother was very sick, and his business had been adversely affected by the financial crisis. Community leader Morris Bailey turned to Ricky and asked him to become president of the yeshiva. The institution, like most in our community, was a jewel in need of the right care, sense of purpose, and resolve. Today, Barkai remains a premier institution, graduating young men and women with outstanding middot (values) and excellent academic achievement. Approximately half of the Barkai graduating students get into the class of the high school of their choice; each and every year.

Over the last three decades, the home of Jamie and Ricky Cohen, on Jerome Avenue in Deal has hosted tens of community related events from Chai Lifeline to Elliot’s Legacy, from minyanim when needed to classes, plays, concerts, singles events, and more.

“Throughout our lives together, Jamie has been a partner and initiator of the hesed efforts in which we’ve been involved. We’re incredibly proud of our children and young adult grandchildren, who have built on the foundation given to them and their family legacy, to be initiators of new community efforts to help others, here, in the broader Jewish community, and in Israel,” said Ricky.

“In Judaism we pay it forward. Giving with your time is a primary expression of gemilut hasadim (acts of loving kindness). In Judaism we become, we come into our own, by giving to others. We become happier and more complete. The primary beneficiary of hesed is invariably the giver.”

A genealogist and historian, Sarina Roffé is the author of Branching Out from Sepharad (Sephardic Heritage Project, 2017), Backyard Kitchen: The Main Course, Backyard Kitchen: Mediterranean Salads, and the cooking app, Sarina’s Sephardic Cuisine. She is the editor of Dorot, and holds a BA in Journalism, and MA in Jewish Studies and an MBA. Sarina is President of the Sephardic Heritage Project, Co-Chair of the Brooklyn Jewish Historical Initiative and Chair of the Sephardic Research Division of JewishGen.

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