Advice from Project SAFE Teachers
Be a Good Role Model
Project SAFE is a program run by The SAFE Foundation which teaches 5th through 12th graders at Yeshivah of Flatbush, Magen David Yeshivah and Hillel Yeshiva life skills and drug, alcohol and gambling prevention.
There are things that every parent can do to prevent their teens from taking drugs and drinking. SAFE teachers would like to offer all parents this advice:
Shira Berkowitz, LMSW
Director of the Project SAFE
Program and teacher at MDY
Everyone wants to be loved, and people do all kinds of dangerous and inappropriate things when they feel empty inside. When a child gets the proper amount of attention, support and recognition for his strengths, rather than for his faults, he/she will feel satisfied and strong. This child will have positive self-esteem and can say no to peer pressure. In addition, if parents model healthy coping skills and show that they can enjoy and relax without relying on substances, kids will follow.
Yossi Sirote, LMSW
Teacher at MDY/Hillel
It is important for parents to open a dialogue with their children. Teenagers are not kids anymore. When they are approached as adults, they are more responsive. One thing to discuss is how the teenage brain is still developing, and drinking alcohol excessively will damage vulnerable brain cells. Teens are also not in a stage where their emotional skills are strong. Because of this, drinking and drug use will have dangerous repercussions. Parents should make it very clear how they feel about drug and alcohol use.
Chedvi Perr, LSCW
Teacher at Hillel
Parents may turn a blind eye and allow their kids to go to parties where there will be alcohol and drugs, but are then horrified if something bad happens. We cannot put our kids in situations where they will surely be led to drink and then be disappointed that they do. Often, teens cannot set appropriate limits for themselves, because they are being pressured by their friends. When a parent forbids a child from being in an unhealthy atmosphere, the teen can blame the parent for not being able to go. Even if the protest is strong, the teen is grateful to have clear boundaries.
Eli Amzalag
Teacher at YOF
Unfortunately, teenagers see some of the adults in their lives engaging in questionable activities. This speaks volumes. Teens also realize that parents can be quickly pacified with mild retorts (it was my cousins wedding/party) and get away with it. This response, albeit not deliberately or consciously, can nurture bad habits.
Penina Ginsberg
Teacher at YOF
As the years progress, the youth get more and more desensitized. What was once unacceptable has become the norm and unfortunately, reality. Parents should be aware of whats going on with their children and keep the lines of communication open. Get to them before the media and the American culture take hold.
Avi Smus, TCI
Teacher at YOF
Kids can be very innocent and unsuspecting. They do not recognize that others want to make a quick buck off of them. But our children are the most precious things to us, and if they are looking for attention, we must recognize it. Being involved and providing constant love and non-judgmental support is crucial. Some parents do not know how to do this, but they can learn.
Reading Suggestions
Drugproof Kids: The Ultimate Prevention Handbook for Parents to Protect Children from Addictions, by Frank Simonelli, Jr.
Addiction Proof Your Child: A Realistic Approach to Preventing Drug, Alcohol, and Other Dependencies, by Stanton Peele
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk, by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish
If you or someone you know needs help, please call The SAFE Foundations confidential, toll-free hotline, 24/7 at 1-866-569-SAFE
