When I heard that Rabbi Labaton’s, a”h, condition had worsened, I was completely immobilized with feelings of sorrow and pain, love and regret.
I regret not calling the Rabbi with every question, not attending every class I could have, not living my life in a way that would make him completely proud, and not being a better friend throughout his illness.
Words of consolation came from friends who knew how dear the Rabbi was to me. One person said that many people live their lives without really making a significant mark, but that the Rabbi had affected so many and so significantly! When I looked around at the funeral and thought of the others filling auditoriums in schools and shuls in Brooklyn and in Deal, I realized that what the Rabbi did for me was what he did for multitudes! How many of us feel that we have lost a father…
He always made me feel that I was important – worthy of his time and attention. I was just 17, and I used to stop in the Rabbi’s office a few times a week to share thoughts, poetry, or to borrow a book (that I had to promise to return). He guided me to read his favorites: From reading writings of Viktor Frankl, I understood that a healthy life is fueled with a sense of purpose; From the writings of Abraham Joshua Heschel, I understood that G-d wants a relationship with us. From the teachings of Rav Soloveitchik, I learned that there are two duties of man, one to reflect upon and appreciate the world and the other: to act upon the world and make a difference. I remember at one point, he kept suggesting for me to read a book he knew I had already read. I presume now that he recognized I did not fully absorb the message. I plan to reread.
When we were teenagers the Rabbi held weekly classes in his home for my friends and I. He taught us to think about the quality of our relationships and about issues that we would one day have to think about once married, about treating people with compassion and respect; He taught us that prayer should be reflexive; that it should make an impression on our souls. He showed us the difference between reading the text of the Torah and reading into the text of the Torah.
When I was in high school, we worked together to plan events for the youth. One of his ideas we put into action was a weekly dinner with film and discussion. He carefully chose films that were thought provoking. When I think of how he shaped our minds… And then, he took an active interest in each of our educations post high school and beyond.
Now I see that the Rabbi and Emily were working together like artists quietly weaving a tapestry. They were on a mission to grow our minds, raise our levels of morality, spirituality, scholarship, and activism. And boy, is their masterpiece admirable! Together they influenced the lives of their kahal and the entire community immeasurably. When I think of the unborn children that will be affected by how he has shaped the minds of their parents and grandparents, I am awestruck.
The Rabbi also taught us so much by his actions. I remember once during a couples’ class in his home there was a mosquito dancing up and down his white dining room wall. My family just went through a terrible season plagued by mosquitoes. Our children would wake daily with welts. At night there would be that buzzing in our ears. The Rabbi did not know this. When I saw this insect threatening to bother the Rabbi’s family, I got up in the middle of the class, took a piece of paper, and ferociously slammed to kill. Somehow I missed. That was when the Rabbi got up with a cup and ever so gently released the insect into the summer air. Since then, I think twice before assuming that I have the right to end the life of any living thing just because it is a nuisance.
I remember once stopping in to the Rabbi and Emily’s house to talk with them. They were occupied, so I had to wait. I wandered into the kitchen where their oldest son, Ovadia was sitting at the table and we began to chat. Ovadia was just about 4 years old, but right away, he began to ask me questions about my life. I was amazed! How indicative this was of the home was being raised in. The Labatons are all about catering to the needs of others.
A few months ago, I arranged a meeting between the Rabbi and some of the youth I felt were drifting from Judaism because they had unanswered questions. I realized that doubt could convince a person that he is not religious, nor a true follower of Judaism. The Rabbi told of a very wise person who found that the wiser he became, the more questions he had. Our Rabbi koshered the questioning with one swift story.
Because of the great effort he put forth in life to be a true servant of Hashem, I believe that the Rabbi is now basking so close to Hashem. I hope that he will always inspire my mind, my heart and my actions. I pray that my family and the entire community will be blessed this way as well. We will miss him greatly.
Renee Beyda
